Chaotic dreams of the psychotic darkness
spill into this bright and beautiful new day.
“Why are there so many conflicting thoughts
and desires? Why can’t I make them go away?”
“Peace is in the eternal Mind of God.” I hear
myself with such wisdom and conviction. Yet
another voice, clear and present, also beckons
me thus “I need to be heard. I need to be
loved. I need to be filled. I need to understand.”
These needs, these requests, these demands,
seemingly reasonable and innocent, are the
reason for my lapses of peace.
“Show me the light of true wisdom, Father.”
I hear, unsure, which of the two voices
this time is speaking. Perhaps, on the other
thought, it is another voice. Three voices,
three conflicting sets of wants and needs.
The child needs; the Self knows; the
negotiator tries to make sense of it all.
“The negotiator has the final say. The
negotiator is the home of free will. Choose
well and with much care. Hear the others,
yes, and then, choose well and with